Post-Dentist Cookies

Dear Turkey,

As you know, I have a little dentist anxiety (well, you wouldn't know, because you've never had a cavity, which is why we're officially not friends anymore). So yesterday I did something amazing: I voluntarily went to the dentist to get some "owies" looked at. I know that a normal person would not expect positive reinforcement for doing something logical, appropriate, and healthy, like going to the dentist. I, however, needed to bribe myself.

So I made a plan to pamper/reward myself for something that I should have done anyway: The baby went to daycare, I went to the dentist, and, after, I went to my parents' house, watched the first episode of Downton Abbey season 3 on their fast internet, and made:

chocolate chip shortbread adapted from Vegetarian Times

Okay, okay, I know that the irony police is about to arrest me because I made cookies after going to the dentist. But let me tell you the best part. While I was at the dentist, like, actually in the chair, who busts into the room but MY MOM!?! She brought me flowers, a beautiful vase, and...a giant Toblerone. So, she really is the greatest mom ever (except for me, of course), because that really cheered me up. And I guess the irony police didn't hunt her down for bringing me a huge candy bar (complete with lots of delicious sticky bits) IN FRONT of the dentist.

I love these cookies because they literally take five minutes to stir up, you just bake them all in a sheet like brownies, they keep for a long time (so I hear...mine are already gone), you can mail them (lucky recipients: you know who you are [PS -- I heart you!]), and you can eat the dough without worrying about giving your baby salmonella (but if you eat too much dough you will get a headache...trust me).

Here's what you do:
In a bowl, stir together:
4 sticks (!!!) very soft or melted butter
3 and 2/3c flour
1/2c cornstarch
1/2t salt
1c sugar
1/3c maple syrup that your friend made
2t vanilla extract
2 or 3c chocolate chips (mini are also good)

no leavening agents means you can really taste the butter and flour; normally I would say melting the butter is a no-no for cookies, but that doesn't apply here 

then you smoosh the whole thing into a big un-greased pyrex dish and poke holes all over it with a fork

Bake it at 325 degrees for 35 mins (depending on the size of the pan), or until the sides JUST start to brown. Cool and slice.

1.2 minutes and 5,000,000 calories later

enjoy with a nice side of Downton Abbey and leftovers from your last post...brush your teeth afterwards

I moss you,
Tofu