Black Bean Chocolate Cookies!

Dear Turkey,

Before you call it

An oxymoron, have a

Look at the brownies

I Made Even More Cheese!

Dear Turkey,

Once you make cheese you'll

See how much better it is 

Than cheese from the store

I Made More Cheese!

Dear Turkey,

Just like the last time

I made real, actual cheese

In just an hour

I Made Cheese!

Dear Turkey,

"What flavor of cheese?"

My mom asked. "Easy," I said.

"Easy's a flavor?"

Halvah

Dear Turkey,

You just made falafels. You have half a jar of tahini sitting around. And a whole jar of honey that someone gave you from her bees. Time to make halvah.

I have always loved halvah. I used to buy a big block of it at Zabar's and eat the whole thing. I figured it was a magical delicacy that can only be made in a factory (like daifuku mochi, but that's another story). Thanks to the internet, I have been educated. Halvah is really easy to make. You get to use the thermometer, so that's fun, and it sets up in the fridge.

Nutri Grain Bars

Dear Turkey,

Ah, Nutri Grain Bars: so tasty, so many ingredients I can't pronounce. So I bought the organic ones, but they were almost $1 apiece.

I hunted around on the internet, combined a few recipes, and, voila: delicious, fast, so, so, tasty, and easily made vegan. Many of the recipes that I found required a food processor, so I simplified the dough to skip that step. I was sold, however, on making my own fruit compote instead of using jam; it was easy and totally worth it.

Slightly Savory Muffiins

Dear Turkey,

I love muffins; I eat them for breakfast almost every day. But I don't have many savory muffins in my repertoire. I don't want to eat muffins with onions in them for breakfast and have onion breath all day. Also, savory food doesn't agree with me in the morning.

However, I wanted to make a muffin that I could enjoy with dinner, but wasn't so savory that I couldn't eat it the next morning: a muffin that could accommodate herb butter, orange marmalade, or even nutella (let's be realistic). Also, it had to have cheese in it.

Banana Leather

Dear Turkey,

Scenario:

1. You just got a Trader Joe's and you want to buy everything in there.
2. You just ate a lot of your friend's expensive fruit leather while she was taking a nap and you feel guilty.
3. Your mom asks if you'd like to bake something with her 500 overripe bananas.

Solution:

 

Banana Leather. I looks like leather. For real. It tastes like bananas/caramel/honey/cinnamon/lime. It gives your mouth a workout in just the right way. It cost you: nothing (if using your mom's ingredients), or way less than it would to buy it (even at Trader Joe's).

So Cheap, So Easy (if you are going to be home for, like, 2-5 hrs) Banana Leather

Directions:

Blend 7 ripe bananas (or equivalent amount of other fruit [I would cook apples first]), 2 T lime juice, 4 T honey, and a generous pinch of cinnamon until smooth.

Pour onto a parchment-ed cookie sheet.

Bake at 225 degrees for...well...it depends. Probably about 2-4 hours. If you think you have enough batter to spread between two cookie sheets, I would. The baking time will depend on your oven/the humidity/liquid content of the fruit/size of your cookie sheets/etc. You will see that mine got nice and dark; the middle is like classic fruit leather and the edges are like caramelized banana bark/brittle, which is fine with me. It looks like it would be hard to pull the parchment off the back, but it wasn't.

 

Enjoy,

Tofu

Mung Bean Smoothies

My Fellow Americans,

You know that I am already judging you for not embracing interesting flavors that everyone else loves. (Why don't we have taro flavored medicine?) In the spirit of adventure, I am introducing you to the mung bean smoothie:

It's delicious,

Tofu

Make Your Own Chocolate Milk

Dear Turkey,

I never really thought it was worth it to make my own chocolate milk until I read this blog post. This blog has never failed me (except that I get carpal tunnel syndrome from having to scroll through all of the pictures [which, admittedly, are way better than mine]), so I was kind of won over by her argument that homemade chocolate milk is way richer and creamier than the store bought version.

This is really like a smoothie with no ice, which was nice for a change. I blended up 2 c of vanilla soymilk, 1/2 c frozen raspberries, dates (just 4 or 5 -- that's enough), and 1/4 c cocoa. Make sure you blend it until it's really smooth (which will take like 5 seconds if you have a Vitamix -- I wouldn't know).

It really did turn out thick and creamy, kind of like a cross between a smoothie and a milkshake. The raspberry/chocolate flavor was awesome. I couldn't really taste the dates, but they added sweetness and made it a little thicker while counteracting the powdery-cocoa-thickness. It was so satisfying that I turned down a trip to the ice cream store right after I drank it. True story. Space placemat optional.

Enjoy,

Tofu 

Sweet AND Savory Onion Bread

Dear Mark Bittman,

Thank you for inventing this sweet AND savory onion bread. I have to admit, I was a little skeptical when I saw the recipe, because I am lazy and I didn't want to pre-cook the onions, but I trust you, and, once again, you didn't let me down.

First, I cooked 2 c of onions (sliced thin and not too long) in 2 or 3 T of butter until they were clear and soft but not too brown. Then I buttered a pie plate and sprinkled 2 T of brown sugar on top of the butter. I poured the onions on top of that.

Then I mixed 2 c flour, 1 T baking powder, 1 t salt, 1 t sugar, 1 egg, 1 c milk, and 1/4 c oil. I poured that whole business on top of the onions and baked it at 350 degrees for 35-40 mins (it won't take as long as you think, but, then again, I guess you would know).

While it was baking I cooked some eggplant, carrots, zucchini, garlic, and potatoes in sesame oil, butter, brown sugar, tamari, and rice vinegar. It was kind of like an Asian stir fry/stew. I poured it over the bread and ate it with a fork and lots of hot sauce.

Good job, Mark,

Tofu

Those Fruity Vinegars

Dear Turkey,

Remember when you gave me these fruity vinegars?

I know, it was probably for Christmas, but I was saving them. You can stop judging me now because I finally used them:

I cooked some scallops in some butter, oil, salt, and garlic (enough so that you can flip them, but not so much so that they don't stick at all, since you want them to get all crispy), flipping them once, until they were nice and brown and their middles were 135 degrees. Then I removed the scallops and the fat and deglazed the hot pan with white wine, lime juice, and the blood orange fruity vinegar (again, just enough of each so that there is a centimeter or two of liquid in the bottom of the pan). I scraped the browned umami-sensation-fat off of the bottom of the pan for a minute or two, and poured the sauce over the scallops. Deglazing the pan makes delicious sauce and makes you feel like you really know how to cook every time you say it. 

I served them with a risotto kind of like this one and asparagus. 

For dessert, ice cream from where I got married topped with balsamic/blackberry fruity vinegar sauce/caramel. I know in my head that vinegar is really just sugar, but it's still fun to cook it down (slowly!) until it turns into a sauce/caramel/rock (depending on how long you cook it). I didn't add any extra sugar or fat or anything:

So you can feel free to buy me some more presents, now that you know I'm not saving them,

Tofu

Okay, Maybe Capers Aren't That Bad

Dear Turkey,

I know that part of my identity is not liking capers. But then today, I actually ate one. Umami sensation. How could I have not liked that for the past 30.88 years?

Also, I know I told you I don't like ricotta. But then my mom made me make this Asparagus Ricotta Tart with Puff Pastry (yes, from the freezer).

I was wrong (Mom: that is a link to the recipe). But I still don't like change.

Tofu

Flavors

Dear Other Countries,

Why do Americans only want the same old boring flavors of stuff? Now, perhaps I am being America-centric, and you guys are all sick of your exciting flavors and just want some strawberry ice cream. 

My favorite flavor of gelato is pear. Pear isn't even that weird, and we actually grow pears here, but I am shocked with food ecstasy if I find pear gelato anywhere except grom.

This is a sesame smoothie. It is delicious. And the Pocky is a much better choice for my waistline than what I had last time. 

Double tapioca, please

Next time, I am having a mung bean smoothie,
Tofu

Ethiopian Food?

Dear Turkey,

As you know, I love Ethiopian Food. If only I could make it taste as good as it does when we go out. I had a realization: I've made beans and rice thousands of times. I've made Ethiopian food 5 or 10 times. So, I need to practice.

I did some research, and a message board on food52 directed me to an Ethiopian recipes website. For the injera, I pretty much followed the directions, except, instead of fermenting the dough, I added some of my sourdough starter and just let it stand at room temperature for about 8 hours. I cooked it in a nonstick pan with a tiny bit of oil and it turned out pretty good. 

The yellow split peas were tasty. The only change that we made was that we pureed them (and they required a little more water than the recipe said; maybe because I cooked them hotter). 

We still need practice the stew. We think that maybe this recipe is more "busy" tasting than what we are used to; it turned out like Indian curry (which makes sense because there are Indian influences on Ethiopian food). 

For dessert, I blended frozen bananas, a few dates, soymilk, and cinnamon. Then I froze it for another half hour or so. I topped it with my easy chocolate sauce: maple syrup with cocoa stirred in. 

I moss you,

Tofu

Oh Yes I Did...

...make empanadas with:

15 oz (one can) pumpkin
15 oz (one [smaller] can) sweetened condensed milk
Brought just to a boil and then cooled
With 1 c mini chocolate chips stirred in

Makes 10

Falafel!

Dear Turkey,

I am so excited about last night's culinary adventure: falafels (falafel? you will want to know the plural of falafel because you will want more than one; or you can just say: Honey, cook me another falafel, my plate is empty!). 

We decided to make falafel(s) because we needed an extra cheap meal this week, since our baby needed more diapers, wipes, and diaper cream for daycare (since we can't use cloth diapers there, I assuage my guilt by buying 7th Generation or Earth's Best -- they cost more, so they must be better!). And those come out of the grocery budget. We adapted the following three recipes from our favorite Mark Bittman cookbook (but all of his books are good!). 

For the falafel:

cover one bag of Goya (please) dried chickpeas with water and soak for 24 hours, adding water as needed

Then, in the food processor, combine:

The chick peas (save a little of the water to add to the mixture -- only if the food processor requires it)

Juice of one lemon

1c parsley and stems

2 cloves garlic

1 small onion

1-2 t coriander, cumin, cayenne, chili powder, salt, and pepper

1/2 t baking soda

Form the mixture into patties with your hands. Mark Bittman says to deep fry them, but we shallow fried them with olive oil in a nonstick pan, turning once when the bottom was really quite brown, and they were beautiful (not because we are on a diet, but because we didn't want the house to smell like fried all week). We just made enough for dinner and saved the rest of the uncooked mixture in a container in the fridge to cook at our leisure.

Tahini Sauce:

Mix together 1/4c tahini (stir in the oil first)

About 1/4c water or enough to make it runny

Juice of one lemon

Cumin and salt to taste

1 clove garlic minced

Yogurt Sauce:

Mix together 1/4c plain yogurt

1 clove garlic minced 

1 small shallot minced

Salt to taste

(Juice of one lemon: optional, and probably only if you're going to eat it right away because it may curdle in the fridge)

we served the falafel(s) with cukes, onions pickled in rice vinegar and lime juice, cayenne for sprinkling on the sauces, and figs and grapes for dessert

I can't wait to eat this again tonight.

I moss you,

Tofu

I Ate Anchovies

Dear Turkey,

Greetings from the land of

trees with snow on them

and more trees with snow on them

Last night I had a big culinary adventure: anchovies. I have always wanted to like anchovies. They are good for you. They are low on the food chain. They are cheap ($1.99!). They don't spoil. But I was never sure, especially after studying abroad in Italy where, if you tell them you are vegetarian, they put anchovies on everything (don't ask me why; maybe they are trying to fatten you up).

Over the holidays we organized our pantry (romantic, and our baby loved chewing on all the Tupperware). We found a jar of roasted red peppers that expired a while ago (but more recently than 1983). So my husband decided to make a pasta sauce out of them. He asked me to buy cream, feta, and anchovies when I got groceries.

these are the ones I tried; that Oscar guy looked trustworthy

Last night, he cooked some angel hair. Then he sauteed the red peppers with some onions, garlic, cumin, and oregano. Then he added sherry vinegar, lime juice and the dreaded anchovies. He blended it all up and added some cream. Then he served it on the pasta with fresh basil, currants, and feta (and he would have used pine nuts but they were out at the grocery store).

When I tasted it I realized:
1) It was delicious (and I know he thought so too, because he wrote it in our cookbook), and not too fishy (my fear).

2) I have eaten anchovies before, and not just in Worcestershire sauce. I immediately felt like I was at one of our favorite Italian restaurants, even though I have never ordered anchovies there before (see 1st paragraph).

I would print the recipe (and a photo) here but my husband said that it is proprietary ("you can put your recipes on the blog"). So, honey, if I left something out above, I leave it up to you to correct the public. I threatened to make a new category on the blog called: Things My Husband Made and Doesn't Want Me To Put On Here, but, since he subscribed, I'd probably have to protect it with a password.

So, anchovies, maybe you and I will be friends. And now my husband wants to try sardines.

I moss you,
Tofu